FUNNIEST ONE LINERS IN GOLF

Brand new golf balls have a strong attraction to tree lines and water. The strength of the attraction is in direct proportion to how expensive the ball is.

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The best golf partners are the ones that are not quite as good as you.

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Your golf game is so bad, you had to re grip your ball retriever

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You should always try before you buy, especially when buying a putter. Never buy a putter until you’ve seen how well you can throw it.

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The problem with your golf game is that you are standing too close to the ball after you’ve hit it.

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If your golfing buddy can’t remember whether they hit a 5 or a 6 on a par 3, he most probably shot a 7.

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My golf game is a lot like masturbating – I enjoy it a lot, but it’s not pretty to watch.

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The problem with golf groups is that the slow ones are always in front, and the fast ones are always behind you.

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Golf is a strange game – you yell “fore”, shoot a 7 and write down a 5

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The higher the handicap of the golfer, the more likely it is that he’ll be telling you what you should be doing to fix your game.

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I find it a lot easier to git the fairway when I tee off if I’m not too picky about which fairway.

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If you are playing with a golfer who says they never cheat, they’re also a liar.

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You can hit a 1 acre fairway 5% of the time, but a 1 inch branch you will hit 95% of the time.

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Golf is similar to sex – It’s still pretty good, even when it’s bad.

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SOURCE: golfpranks.com